Honored by Usha Ma'am & Rukhiya


>> Dec 28, 2008

They say there are three seasons now.
I differ. I say there is only one, greed.

But we have remained the same.
With ours and with mine
With a mind selfishly claiming 'divine'.

We have blamed and awaited a full moon.
Have feared the scorching Sun,
Back-stabbed the winter with a prayer of spring.

Mocking this obstinacy, it has rained in winters,
Clouds have shaded some summer noons,
Autumn leaves have never denied the gravity.

The rainbow we see bent with stripes across the horizon,
Was straight until you & I realized that the earth is round.



An Imperfect Palindrome

>> Dec 25, 2008

A pen.
A pen and a paper.
A pen and a paper and a plot.
A pen and a paper and a plot and a poet.
A poet and a plot and a paper and a pen.
A poet and a plot and a paper.
A poet and a plot.
A poet.

A perfect palindrome?
Starts and ends in uselessness.




I often stop by the mirror and see
If the diary behind my back overshadows me.

I know its not possible.
Because physics has rules
that sets lights straight.

But in this world of poets and stories
They have a different rule that even they don't know!
I fear,
One day I will not be fast enough
To chase down the words I believe to have caged.

I have seen people who are phobic to noise.
Trust me, it is still better than silence.




6:00 AM - Alarm clock.
8:00 AM - Office calls.
1:00 PM - Lunch break
6:00 PM - Love awaits.
8:00 PM - Love departs.

A routine that we follow is named Love.
Difference? Is of a film to that of a theater.

How 'much' do you want?
One pound of flesh? no more, no less.
Or may be two stanzas full of four lines.

One will say the other betrayed,
The other will protest under another curtain.
If you can not find love
Inside the pauses,
After the lines,
Beyond the adjectives that die down
to yet another punctuation,
you haven't really felt love, have you?

And if you have,
still set the alarm clock to a time convenient,
You will never know
how time runs by and tide awaits
Where love lies dead but still pretends.




>> Nov 22, 2008

Purposeless is the soul
That lives for his,
And is owned by others.

To share a word
Through love or award
Transgresses the barriers
And shows us the world that
breathes together.

A bond that frees us more
Binds us less
and respects
Till infinity tires and rest.


[p.s.- The award logo (butterfly award) is generously passed on to me by Usha ma'am and Sashu, two amongst my very few inspirations @ blogging.

Continuing the trend, lemme pass this award link to



and anyone who finds poetry respectable, its for you. Own it because this logo can not find a better place but your musings museum.

So, as Instructed in the Ways of Award Presentation and Conferring, this is what has to be done, as I understand, from Usha ma'am :)

1. Put the logo on the blog. by downloading the picture and adding it as a picture widget

2. Add a link to the person who presented it to you.

3. Pass this one, and link other bloggers that you'd like to share it with.



>> Nov 7, 2008

Hopes are white
Nights! I know them black.

I met a man the other day
He sees but never observes.
What is the difference between two lives
When at the end you see black
and the other observes death?
Is the pain any less and certain?

I love to see kites flying
Do they mean independence?
You fly high with your greed strung...
A rooted flight,
How much can you pay for such freedom?

I know I talk gibberish,
I have grown old now.
I see white and black
In stripes of unknown dimensions.

But you?

You have an irreparable wound of shallowness.
I see your blood and that is not blue
Will it ever coagulate? You fear, I laugh.

You can never know how porous you are;
I know.
I saw your soul walking down the street that day.

You were too busy selling your dreams.


[p.s. -> hemostasis is the cessation of blood loss from a damaged vessel. Coagulation is its defense mechanism

docs, pardon me for if I am wrong]



>> Oct 19, 2008

There were times when
I used to find nature selfish
Because it was seasonal;
And not like poetry that comes
Even in the outrageous summers or rusty winters
Or catalytic rains.

Its been long
Where Memories have flooded down
Many a prayers
That had names of us and verses.

I still stand under that pine
Where words used to come to me
Like soft breeze that blows within,
For inspirations better lived with you.

Today this pauper poet awaits them
And the pine leaves fall as if gifting me
A silent poetry of yours, in rhythm.

I still search for those crystals that
My palms had soaked thence.

The color of blood was faded that day.




>> Oct 10, 2008

I will put the lights out tonight.
Certainty is not you, I know.
On the floor where scented sticks
burn themselves with aroma,
I will remember you.

Oh, till how far should the memory be traced
If I wish to remember?

I will leave the doors open tonight.
You are in disguise, I know.
In my balcony where full moon reflects
And lends me a hazy twin of hers,
I will see you refracted inside me.

Oh, till how far should the lights obey physics
If I wish to see the seen?

I will dance in the rain tonight.
"Rain is mine", you used to say, I know.
On that lawn where droplets evoke soily smell
And cold breeze iterates,
I will soak you inside me.

Oh till how far is it raining?
Tell me its the same the droplet that wets me,
awaits you.



The Chosen One

There will be ours
And there will be yours.
But what if creations cry out,
What are the creators' worth?

How can you distinguish
Which rose to choose
If ever you knew, one plucked
Makes the others cry?



Snake Skin

In winters I woke up
And saw blood in my hand.
Blood- of conscience or
of realization?
I watched my epidermis
peeling itself off,
As if in hatred for my flesh.

Unaffected me crawled across my bed.
Because I know,
At night, sheepishly
When I will come out of
My snake skin, I will forget
about blood of theirs
that had stained mine.

I will rejoice the spring




>> Sep 28, 2008

Virtues & Vices

Beauty comes with mortality.
It makes me insecure.
Because one night, when I discover
That it has left me alone for winter
How will I answer to my desires?


I often wonder what is more futile?
To let love fall free
When you know of gravity
To wait for it.
What if the same force pulls it down?

Do We...

May some questions never have answers.
Because, you know, I know,
In some cases, we never choose the red.
We avoid the black instead.


Life is never complex.
Only the explorer remains confused.
Because surety is death,
Before that, there is life and Many a tripods


[A pure rambling. Feel free to avoid]



In front of the sea that speaks silence,
You and me stand close, counting the waves
and inscribing the names of ours on the wet sand.

Vulnerability is something that allures one from within
Isn't it ?
That is why we always choose the sea instead.

You wouldn't listen and I wouldn't say,
So the obvious silence mixes with twilights
And flies on with the wet breeze that caresses.

I relive myself with the tides.
They accept the inevitable at the shore,
Still they rise, if for once, they can grow
And never touch the ground, ever again.
"Don't you know they never can ?" you say.
"Then why do you wait by the sea" , I ask.

With yours and mine, our scribbled names,
That never were etched deep within the sand,
My own optimism rushes them to futility--
Another wave and they are gone, abstruse.

What you never know is its not the swells.
Its me who disorients the hyphen in between.
Then I let the waves to flow,

...So that you come and I hope, for that evening
When the hyphen will remain
And the waves will never touch the sands.




>> Sep 7, 2008

Thousand of words like these
I can write for you
Which you won't ever see
Which I will put to flames
and inhale the blue death

Was it too much to ask twice?
You will talk of rough edges
Point out to missing commas , fullstop.
I will nod correcting my emotions
At the cost of them

When can you ever sense
The feeling I have for you
Suffocates and dies under the velvet
That adorns my poesy
But buries my love ,





At times when I can't sleep ,
I look at the snowy hills
That tells me I have a beloved
On the other side , waiting.

When there are no stars
On a dark night sky ,
I paint you with waxed emotions
That melts in my incoherence , abruptly!

They advise me
"Before you die , Cross the mountain once"
When there is full moon , I wish to.

How can I tell them ,
A dream is a dream and only a dream.
To find it is to lose ,
To let you be is to love.



Multitudes of Nowheres

>> Sep 5, 2008

I don't dread your knives
Or your strengths ,
Because your claws are too cowardice
To be shown except between us .

The pool of blood
You can spill
With one stroke of yours
Is the one I would have anyway ,
And have been till now ,
Under the skin.

You never were akin to
My veins to see that ,
Were you?


Labelled with relations
That can convey higher multitudes,
Some creations confuse
The creators , don't they?

If I tell you this story is of
Blood and poisons ,
Of serpents and avenges
would you be careful to consider
A man and a woman ?
A poet and the pen ?
The creator and His Frankenstein?

Can words mislead you to
Multitudes of nowheres?

So how do we trust them then!




>> Aug 31, 2008

Wait beside that jasmine tree dear.

I will find you through
the gates of romantic air ,
Where your charm n her scent
dilute into irresistible wishes.

We will whisper our dreams
On the cold wintry evenings,
On the offshore of springs
Till the full-moon awares us .

"Oh thy beauty can elude the
blooming jasmines into early offerings"
--I will write such lines or two
being far off from the world we call 'real' .
We only chose to live the dreams
With us together , didn't we?

Oh yes, they say
To err is human ,to love is divine.
So one day I may not kiss you that softly ,
Your tender palms may seem a bit rough ,
Still the evening jasmine will remain
And spread around our fragrance of love
In silent and pure diffusion .

Wait under the jasmine tree dear ,
For that final time.




>> Aug 10, 2008

The sky is yours ,
So is the wind.
On all those treaded paths where
Uniqueness recycles ,
A very common man awaits you.
Who never let the icicles melt,
never let the chimes to stop humming
And never robbed words from his pen
For you made him grow .

Scars were all I got .
But did you ever notice a tinge of red?

Today don't let those wounds heal ,
Because at my funeral , in your presence
I will dip the white roses with blood.
If for once you accept ...

...The Eucalyptus will convey my glee.
The roots reach where I lie , deep within
Where you couldn't ,ever.

and from there it will whisper ,

Would you ?

Careful with those fragile leaves dear,
Its always been winter.



String of Love

The crimson sky will depart
As the dreamy moon shall glow
In its soft and sensuous freedom.
Under the starry sky ,
Where the oyster shells reflect
Feeble white hopes ,
I will write you one letter
With no destination .
I know you will read it
At once.

When did we ever need
a nylon to show
We are threaded ?




I won't call life uneven.

It was your smile,
Those glances,
Subtle nods , whispers
that gestured me in this world.
And when I am too much in it ,
You blur out!

It is now those green liquids ,
these stimulators I need
To be in a world
Where I don't belong.
But I must pretend ,I do.

When syringes find no more
virgin skin ,
Would you come and take me
Where I wish to ?

Can you ever squeeze in me
To that short space
Where green is for hope ?




>> Aug 3, 2008


He waited for them,
But they never came .

In the ceremony of words,
the cards were never sent to
the alphabets.

And he sat , lonely ,
without those guests .
A blank page , a vacant gaze.
And moments conspired to
Poison him slowly.

On his last breath ,
He wrote , ...

We conclude ,
Pauses punctuated him to


He invited them ,
But they denied.

and he slit his own wrist.
Failed , deranged.
The so called alternatives
robbed the soul that remained.

They stabbed him ,
All over.
Blood diluted the pigments
Of creation.

Did someone ever say ,
Words are blunt ?


P.S.-- Rajarshi's "Poetic Prose" has cast its influence here.



>> Jul 30, 2008

It was an autumn afternoon
When we had flown the last kite,
Abandoning it at the sky
watching the orphaned paper-stick
Going away ,far,
Somewhere we couldn't see
As he had too , for all these years.

At this stage of life
Where the mind is restless for those
lost pictures, the blurry images
Were suddenly fresh with his arrival.

-Long time , no ?
--Really .Seemed ages.

Breathlessly we talked of
Memories we knew of us ,
we had of our own
Like kids savouring
Their bits of the afternoons.

Some moments are
As we walked towards our
Youthful reminiscence ,
Never knew how
Space and time abided by emotions.

-Look , that kite !
--So what ?
-Should we,now ?
--Who else is watching ?
-Do you care?
-- -(giggles)

And we ran.
Silently in unison ,
For you ,
A thousand times over!


[For all the friends I have , A true flight it has been for me ,because of you all]



>> Jul 27, 2008

In a perpetual circle of
complex vicinity,
I stand aloof and wondrous,
perplexed with the questions
that are too rough to be asked ,
Too smooth to beget.

The mind masturbates
With an overpowering lust ,
follows passion and
at last a guilt
to take nothing for
tomorrow but the night
and we find an escapade in sleep.
Do we actually?

We know we could
rebel against things that
We don't wish for ,
But never did , because
to us , sins are worth waiting for.

As even the snakes meet
To climb up the passion
of each other ,
Knowing never that
they need an axis to do so ,
Our spinal chords helplessly await
Their turns , but to be defied
of limited hopes .

I watch the jelly fishes glow
on the sea shore , alluring .
A life so short lived couldn't have
offered more divine a sight
while praying for the wave
to be intrinsic ;
For ever
To take it home.




>> Jul 13, 2008

When we sit with each other
In assurance , the candle lights up
Uncertainty ,but in vain.

I see you , a bit.
you talk to me , a lot.
And we cherish ,both.

The flame dances beyond our
Shadows ,ever so curious
To reach there ,but .

We keep things vague ,as if
bearing the impotence of that candle to
Reach afar.

Aren't we the same
Even after so many candle-lits?

Emotions are more
Like this wax .
It melts within and burns,
Then freezes, --
Disoriented ,
But still there ,
Until another match

We await ,
Not knowing
whether to fall prey
Or to let it die .




>> Jun 30, 2008

Then you will List ,

--your Tooth brush and My tooth brush
--My Shaving cream
--Your cosmetics
--My books
--Your music player
--My clothes
--Your clothes
--A comb that we will share.
--Some medicines

I will check
And pick up the pen
To add

+ --My Love
--Your love?

of all the things,
it had to be mentioned
if for once we forget
To leave it behind.

And pretend
We didn't ,
till date.


[Stone me .I know weirdness has its limits]



>> Jun 29, 2008

A collage of memories
bring in autumn leaves
To my window.
A heart that rejoices lonesome
interiors and admires
Abstract arts ,
is poisonously indefinite,No?

Though turtles race
Abjecting time ,why can not
I ?
Is this the reason
You paint the smoky sky
With different shades?

Wishes abounds fill the
palette of my senses
with coloured glasses
As I observe gray streets
from kaleidoscopes.

But when its black,
How will you protect
My fragile self
being unreal ,

For its only Your touch
What speckles the diamond ring
from the eclipse that
blots me black .


P.S.--I hate doing this but

lemme put my visions.I know its not to be discovered unless its told.But try to match the far fetched analogy if possible.Time =society , turtles = the scientists who used to spoon feed religious preachers of then , kaleidoscope is said to be Galileo's invention first , You is obviously God , 'when its black' means when ppl r not to see the truth how can u speak the truth out and only an eclipse could prove earth goes round the Sun not the other way around.That was his diamond ring of quest.And the last black is what makes him blind as he grows older but eclipse never came.

that is why it is Uneclipsed.

Galileo was a great admirer of art too :)

Thank you for your patience!!



>> Jun 28, 2008

All the emotions
I could give words to ,
have somehow dried up with
my infidelity with pauses.
Now ,they come at once,
all too many and
I find myself at loss with
some rough sketches that were
never coloured to poetry.

Thoughts have
left me with some sheets of papyrus
which mock me with criss crosses
that are too blue and too frequent.

So I travel only in winters
To laugh at the naked trees ,
To wink at your rough exterior
And to redeem myself with
companionship of being deprived.

Still , quite unfairly
A cold wind blows
Through the windows
and nudges my notebook
as it strips itself up
from prologue to rest ,
That I had shown dreams to
of being limitless.
But now,
At the verge of perdition
it takes revenge of
of its countability,
baring all.

An epilogue awaits.
and now
So do I .




>> Jun 25, 2008

On moments such as those
Sleep used to be pregnantly
due for months ,
When you ,quite in haze with
your own assurances
Used to break the peace
With your belongings,your acquaintances
And your parties.

Pandemonium had a sweet social
escapade in 'gatherings' --
the way you termed it
leaving me lonely,miserably alone
On a bed that was comfortable for two
and misplaced for one,
night after night
And yet another followed.

So when we got separated ,
Finally in social eyes ,
I thought of the days
I couldn't sleep because of
The noise that distancelessly
Formed a bubble
In between us
And burst one day due to
my pinpricked tolerance.

Then ,like a happy story ends
With a spongy touch to heal
The pains I had suffered ,
I set my eyes closed
Only to realize
there was too much of silence
That night.

I cried to fill in the void
I sank myself in.

Either way,
An Insomniac.



Theatrical only ?

>> Jun 24, 2008

He creates the backdrop,
the lights and the shades.
The curtain is coloured blue ,
detailing situational turnarounds ,
The sets ,the floors ,
the bends.
And You enter
as if unknowingly ,
Unnoticed ,questioning your
own existence at that brink.

Where in that stage
The protagonists play aloud,
Act with authority
And remorse in silence ,
You stand under the sea of darkness
Only to be a nobody but one.

You clap after scenes ,
swing with the way the
the puppeteer prompts invisibly
to your emotions ,
timing your tears and laughs to
Rich benefits, since you
see nothing but real illusions.

Only the events alter
And time ticks on
As you play the part of a
mute spectator .

One day your pink hopes
Dilute in the colourless wishes
of too many shades
and leaves you amazed
As another curtain falls...

And never rises




>> Jun 13, 2008

When I am not here,
One day
May be the sepiatic sun-rays
Of dying afternoon
Will haze my picture at
the wall.
And you ,
On that spur of the
Moment will miss me from
Missing Us.

For some memories
That would suffice such
Momentary pain ,
That I was so relieved at
being in love,
You will search my cupboards,
Drawers for something
That would play the
Narcotic to your restlessness.

If ever ,
You find that red diary,
with parchment glues and
Dying fountain inks,
You will get to know dear
Of chapters I never shared
Even with you.

You will realize
Why I didn't let you
In to the Whole of me
Love to fill in
for those unexplained pages.

Some pigments are too acidic
No ?




>> Jun 12, 2008

Yet again in this world
An unruly Goliath will slay David ,
Another Judas will stab Jesus
and we will count numbers after
the world wars ,
The victims ,the anguishes ,
the helplessness.
You will watch from
Inside your house
sheepishly,waiting an unreasonable fear.
A normal death
Would be so comfortably
Unexpecting. Isn't it ?

And then after the show ,
When you tranquilize your
with sips of alcohol ,
You will read out some prophecies loud
and go to bed
To pounce upon your prey.
And it will iterate.

Life will recycle
Until one day ,

You will blame the
Sand clocks for not being
Except the midnights.




>> Jun 8, 2008

You offer me Clouds
I offer you rains,
So that I pour down
Unto you .

You offer me a glass
I delude opacity
So that eyes don't miss
Each other ever.

You offer me words,
I prefer silence ,
So that you speak
And I listen forever,

You write me a poetry,
I offer you me.
To live beyond the parchments
of words,

I live
In you,
Without pauses.



Crescendo of Love-notes!

>> May 28, 2008

Your music
Brought me to this place
Where I don't yearn for the flute
To play the reminiscer,
Where I don't bear the
Pain of angst and despair
That my Violins used to

I was the creator of
Those tunes where I
injected passion to welcome
all ,
to my parade of prestige.

But now its all
Too harsh in-front of your
Subtle notes,
All too incoherent behind
Your smiles and giggles.

Because I stand
in this silent podium
Of life ,
devoid of any glitters,
glamours and claps,
the depth of love
I have for you ,
And there
I am just too novice to
pen a notation.

Hold my hand dear
So that
You teach ,
I learn and
We ripple
the silent symphony,
that for once and for all
melts the
Crescendo into
Undying refulgence.




>> May 22, 2008

It will be again Them
For whom I will
Put up glowing lipstick,
Crimson colors,
The ghungroos ;
Bangles?? oh! they
Are too noisy.

And then,
Like the way you invite
Winter to bare all up
Just to let Spring in next,
They will do so.
Push me where I go
Every night.
Different faces,same souls.
Confounded in desires and lust.

I will take it all.
As long as you are there
To ask me ,
"How are you ?"
The next morning.
Oh! how I love the deceptive
Glad I don't have a mirror.
How I know how the world is.
They never turn up to me
In the mornings,
except you.

Learning it all that 'I'
Can't be loved ,
You ,unpretentiously ,gave me
What I dreamt of!

And that is what I
Don't make me dream honey.
They are long gone
Under the tormented beds of
Naked petals.
I don't want to feel
Purity because
Here ,for us ,
It costs them
Five hundred.

Door clutches
Your next..



To let

Sometimes in life
We rethink a phase
When we are done by.

Was it destined to
Happen only here ?

And we ,with our
Restrictive calculations
Measure the latency :
Like as if
Moths are to indulge
into fire.

Its all about romancing
that emotion
You never knew
was inside.

But as you did ,
You care for 'we'
Forgetting the effects,
Ignoring the age
and the hideous 'what if's.

Feelings bridge the gaps
of two lonesome hearts
You just respond
To the call.

To name it
is to melt the ice
that kept the moments frozen.
Don't you ever.




>> May 21, 2008

If it had
Only been about appearance,
I would have
chosen the best brands
and accessories
and perfumes and
make ups
to come in-front of you.

But what if
It had rained that day!
Would you have
Loved a troubled face ?
a messed up me ?

I wonder why
Love had to be staged
when it was only you,
Who knew
How I am &
More importantly
How we are.

If at all
It had no curtains
In between.



Futile Solution...

>> May 19, 2008

Beyond the azure sky
The first rain awaits
Its fall.
And down there
that blue eyed
Boy hopes,
He would dilute
At the same time
with his ..

Moments lapse.

Then the
Drops reunite
Whispering one's grief
To the other .

Who would have thought,
Even decadence finds
Its solace in
Desperate communion!




>> May 18, 2008

You give me a
White tablet often.
White, you say,
Your favourite colour.
I resonate that to
My heart and gulp it down
Every night.
And you stand assured
Pretending a smile ,
Thinking that I won't know
These biochemics would cramp me up,
Will stress my nerves
Smilingly erasing me to
A mental coma.

Still I nod
And gulp them down
In memory of those dreams
I saw of us ,
You promised of us...
And kill myself
Willingly so that you be
Happy ,
knowing never ,
How there would be no tomorrow
For you ,after tonight
Just like me.

"...It was never a revenge dear.
Its just the game you played
And we lost.
Atleast, something together."


P.S.-- The first few lines are borrowed from S.Rukhiya's ''Present..?'' ..Just a different outlook that I tried to manage from the very same context!



I would have loved
A nod.
Even 'No'
Would have been bearable
To compromise with
Some sleepless nights.
Your compassionate pause
Built me a glass wall
That was opaque enough
To hide my face
so that tears could escape

That was when
I started to like the
Glass palace around,
Because I had to
Defy the moments
you were in.
I fought against me.




>> May 13, 2008

And we are captured
Into a single page of lamination
That holds a hundred others
Of memories--
But importantly Together.

"Look at her as she smiles"
"And look how crazy I was"
"Oh you,always flying !"
"and Sam ? where is he ?"
Tons of comments passed on
from here and there,
As I get my copy of memory
And keep it in the diary,
That has no dates
But a farewell to my friends,
Promising nothing,
Only a "..will miss you all"
to sob me with mine,
With tears I didn't know
How to shed .

As I looked up ,
I saw in haze
some giggling nascent eyes
With me ,
My memory and



The neon lights
Create a mystic fog
Around the footpaths,
As hundreds of faces
Enlighten themselves
For that brief moment,
Passing by
the blues,the greens,
the fluorescence
And smiling a fake smile
glittered in naked fashion.

On the other way
To the dark side of the moon
People celebrate success by vodkas
and break offs with another sip
In the same table,
With nuts and guts!
Where citylight dares to reach
Just a bit.
And they laugh at others,
and their own fates.
As ladies dance their way to
Heaven in necropolis
Holding on to steely truth,
Behind bars!

Somewhere in between
Lies the scent of the dwellers,
Who choose both ways
Only alternate days
And their souls thrash into
Mercedes and Fiats and Marutis.
Still they live again
As the neons glow
With a light that is better put off.
And the faces laugh
In the fluorescence that reveals plastic
To the dark that hides their names.



A Promise

Tiptoeing through the
Darkness as the First glow
Reaches us,
I come out
In that shivering breeze
And a blue sky.

As I progress with
Naked feet, the dew drops
die of innocence
Comforting ,reminding me
Of the last night's

And I run like a child
Willingly leaving all my
Burdensome adulthood
To the horizon
Where you paint a bit of a yellow
As if alluring me into it.

Happily I reach afar
Till I fall short of breath.
Panting I return,
Promising myself like a teen
That I would walk some
Extra yards
So that one day
I reach where You
want me to.
Heaven on earth.



Never Too Late...

>> May 6, 2008

Whisper in my ears
the anthem of love,
For today
I feel not welcoming
The fear of
Snapping the thread yet again.

Could we ever
Imagine that
whimsically Together
The bond would only
grow mature!

"Insane are those who are
In love
And more so are them
Who realize what they are into"

You only had told me.

As I can emote so,
An epic of love won't do,
A monument would only exaggerate.
Proclamation will
Defy the magic of silence.

Being a paraplegic
Who played with the icicles
Knowing winter isn't going to
Last long,

I want to build
you and me
A shade of love

And this time...

Pray no rains...



Desired Hues

>> Apr 30, 2008

I will paint
The rainbow for you
In my little canvas
Of million shades ...

Perfection ??
When I am Us.

I can promise.

Don't bring me a palette
of dark black
The day after.



Black Rose

>> Apr 24, 2008

Wishes that make me
Come around that boulevard
Where lay my
condemned silence
In isolation,

care for my insecurity
And merge with the
Anonymity of this world.

I kill the dreams
That were yet to born
And then the innocence
dies a virgin
Along with them.

Never too special
What I can offer ,
I soliloquy,
So I remain as no one.
And see my
Passion urging,
Aching for recognition.

I object any atonement
The square around me
Shrinks in rage against the
Lonesome owner.


The black rose
Loses its petals
on a dark moon night!


Powered by ScribeFire.



>> Apr 22, 2008

I sit here to write
An epic of love
But words don't pay heed
To my flowing senses.

But what I write is about you.
Who held the rain
at her footsteps,
Who could love the way
Gothics shy
And who can heal my scars
Like I never had.

And what I write is about me.
Who drenched in the rain
Like the raindrops,
Who was loved the way
He dreamt never.
And who cried in the
happiness beyond.

So if ever the rain stops
I would stand near you.
If ever the scars anew
I would feel your healing touch.
If ever I don't sleep
I would breathe you to sanity.

On that rain soaked sands of
And above the presence of
lonesome moon,

You would murmur the
gentle song
That I would echo in silence.
And would pray,
Somewhere,tiptoeing my wishes
Dreams will rush up
To another moment of
blissful song offerings...




>> Apr 19, 2008

The First Glow..

With misty eyes
I stand by the lonesome me.
At the place
Where our plastic city looks
And I wait an endless wait.
Preparing myself.
Emptied the soul for
Purity .Didn't I ?
Wore the divine bliss
Didn't I ?
And at that fragment
He comes,
Rising , efflorescent with
His natural grace.
And I see the insignificant soul
Getting enlightened.
I gaze along
As he rose
On that sky,
And within me.
As I feel
The arrival of a new dawn.


Dimmed to be Brigher..

On that mundane moment
I couldn't have
Had the courage to leave Thee
If it was not You,
To come again!
And I stood in the vast expanse
Of the Sea shore,
On the sands of time
That had been soaked in waves
Guided by Him.
And I see The Sun on the horizon
Betokening the final gesture
On the azure orange sky.
I run,Parallelly
As if not to let go of
My blessings
For an extra moment.
Then you glimpse from
The twilight.
And rob me of my worldly expectations
Reassuring ...

That I am
Still Yours
As you are

... Let the I become We.


Powered by ScribeFire.



>> Apr 17, 2008



[Sorry for the pain to your eyes.But I am merciless.Lolz]

Powered by ScribeFire.


Drops of obscurity...

>> Apr 15, 2008

True assurance
Comes with realization.
May be that is the
Reason I could
Not hold on to your hands,
Or was that because
they were too wet?
Curse the rain sometimes..


Powered by ScribeFire.



>> Apr 12, 2008

Write me a note Colorado,
Tell me how many rocks did you
dance with ?

Write me a note Berlin
And tell me how was it to feel
the wall falling down ?

Can u tell me Marx
if it was possible for you
to make this world more liberal.

I trembled into the
soaking rain
I trembled into the
searing heat.
And didn't you notice me
Crumbling into dust?

I rise,
I fall.
I break down
to break in again
Into you,
Onto time...

I live.

then why can't we ?

Protestants and catholics,
siyas and sunnis
dictators and people
Why can't we be one !

If this is an insane wish
and a far off dream
Then I want your hand
to hold me tight.
I want your support
To be louder...
I want your sanity to
be wild and United.

Take an oath
To live with us
To bury the guns
and the bombs and the missiles.
But not the hammers...

We will need them to
refuel our hopes
and to shake our hands
across the borders
around the seas and
over the hills...

Take your axe friend
and let us make the first blow
to the invisible wall of Berlin
around each one of us.

So that a revolution comes
Without a bullet
And a dream fulfills itself
So that Lennon sleeps
In peace,
And we wake up
With it.

[Peace be with us,Amen]


Powered by ScribeFire.


The Immortals

>> Apr 4, 2008

He won't laugh
The insane laugh again.
You would never see him
Wear that grin,
that actually looked
More 'boyish'.
And I would never have to
Wait for him for hours--
Thought the mother.

He would never cry
In solitude,
In the garage.
He would never
show his Uniform to me,
And the stars he earned,
The medals they gave.
Would not sound proud
At the phone,--
tired but satisfied,
Him and Us--
Thought the father.

And the bell rang.

Behind the doors
Where all assumptions
And anxieties end in the
Bittermost way,
Stood two officers
and a coffin .

He opened the door.
And She collapsed.
Silent tears of his
Overwhelmed the
Remorseful shrill cry of hers.

And they were handed over
His belongings,
He ,who belonged to them
And the country.
And the pride ,the prestige
--The flag.

Inside that wooden box
Lies a body,
Motionless,with a smile.
Who lived life kingsize
Who denied himself
to save us.

And outside,
Stood four seemingly alive
Confused with agony.

---They are those
For whom dying for is
always prior to living in.
So I salute Them---
The Shaheeds
And His cared-fors
For the pain and the prestige,
For the memories and the honour.
And for the immortality
That They claimed
When it was Their first oath.
When They sighed the last breath.


Powered by ScribeFire.


In Sanity.

>> Apr 1, 2008

I will forget you,
Burn you from my memory.
Erase every single moment
The laugh,the cry
The words and at times without..
The tears--loving,hurting
Still craving for more.

I will use science
To map ur souvenirs
Inside my brain,
the lobe and the cells.
And I will wipe you out
From there.

I will shed the last tear
Just before.
I will laugh the insane laugh
Just before.
I will forget that part
Where i dwindled between
heaven & hell;
Where I kept floating on the
insoluble emotions & instead.
I will never be desperate again,
I will never walk in the rain
With you and without.

But I know
It will be the same again.
Till the next day I wake up
And realize,
It was another attempt
Went wrong.
Like millions other did,previously.

When will my insanity rest
And conclude
I can not breathe you out
As long as I am breathing in.

Then I will try a next one,
Satisfyingly reassuring me
of its futility.
Another day....
from Inside.


Powered by ScribeFire.


Loving Neverland

>> Mar 29, 2008

Then we fought again.
the other day.
You for your idealism
Me for mine.
And inside these yours and mine
We died.
Our lives held on to a wire
That we knew
Would eventually cut
Both ways.

But again,
We had started loving Red
By then.


Powered by ScribeFire.


For ever

>> Mar 25, 2008

We pretend
And assure ourselves
Of our immediate present
as a foregone past.

Acidifying our senses,
Our emotions and our reactions,
Should I believe
We aren't together anymore ?

Still we act so natural.
But do we ?

In our stackfull of memories
We see each other,
Feel each other,
Understand &
But still choose to believe
there exists nothing,
After that mutually dreadful day.

I want to ask you just once,
Then why do you
breathe a silent sigh
Whenever I say
"good bye..." !!

To meet and act as strangers
Is so easy for our nerves
That we just forget
Its not that so to
Depart as lovers.
Some questions are self-explaining.
If not,
Then I will take
that sigh for an assurance...
With you around.
Relation unnamed.


Powered by ScribeFire.


Isn't it so ?..

>> Mar 24, 2008

Breathlessly I
Stand my ground


like dreams hushed up

I catch myself in the same tune.
(A reverie that
Seals us into{one},

SUMmation of sentiments
Deep feelings,
Abundance in joy
All tending &
& fulfilling its tangibility
Into That special

When every day is a FULL moon ()
Every moment is so special..

And when confession is so obvious
THAT you almost forget
To say what...
And what not...

In that moment
none of us ARGUE
Why should we
Fill and refill exact words,
when We realize
you and I are just



Powered by ScribeFire.



>> Mar 18, 2008

Its so easy to say
Life is like that.
A breath of fresh air
And a mindful of dreams

Under scrutinies,
Cautious eyes
& social obligations,it
Kills the essence of spontaneity.

Still we love,
With idealism
Romancing with honesty
And a pure heart.
Soon realizing
It isn't happily conclusive always.

False attires,
Diminished hopes
Sweet poison,everyday.
Kills you ,doesn't it ?

But in this
Earthy catchfire
And a lachrymal outcry
Something remains.
Though being apart
We feel the reassurance of
Sharing the same sky
& the same stars.

May be in the sweet nothings
A piece of gold?

Between the two hearts,
& shyly
The fluid just
soothes the inferno
Of a non committal relation..

The solute,that is,
Just is
Feeling together
Being in magic!


Powered by ScribeFire.



>> Mar 17, 2008

You still have those things,
The gifts i sent,
The letters I wrote
The poems I had dedicated.
The ice cream cups,
the chocolate wafers.
All the sweet nothings.

People call me insensitive.
May be a paranoia.
'Cause I don't have those
Which you have of me.
How would i tell you
and why should I tell them,

Only a blink of an eye
Was enough for me
To relive those days.

Can't you see
I had you &
I have you ,
the whole of Us
As my memorabilia.


Powered by ScribeFire.



>> Mar 16, 2008

I will be burning again
In your desire,
In the passion of the
Unblemished flame.
And if not the lesion
ignites one more scarface
I will alone usher in the paradise
for Us,for love.
"Hurt me
Burn me ..."
Will scream my soul.
I want to rekindle from the ashes
Of your memories
Where You burnt me in thy passion
And I loved thee in salvation...


Powered by ScribeFire.


Getting Enlightened...

>> Mar 15, 2008

he stumbles across
the streets
And murmurs the
deepest agony .
I can feel it.
Isn't he the poet we knew,
We admired?
Is he a past now...
forgotten between the pages
And the words of the caricatures ...

So I went up to him.
And offered him a helping hand.
If ,at all,he holds on to them
and the words bloom
Like the yester days.

But it was not to be.
he crawled up his way,
And seeing my eager face
Realized my greed
And he agreed.

On a torn paper
With a pen that didn't seem
To be mightier than a sword
at all.
He wrote
"Your life has a deeper poetry
Than my pen can ever offer."

And i stood amazed.
His seemingly impotence
was the highest enlightened bit
Called Life.

Powered by ScribeFire.



>> Mar 14, 2008

Sometimes we
Hold each other in
Love's embrace
And a softness radiates
Inside me for you
That transforms the glow
In your face.
And i can read between
Your eyes.
If you say the truth
Or the lie,fewer times?

For each day you dedicate me a rose
Calling me better
But I can sense
When it is a pretence
And when it is just Me.

Inside you
I reside.
When you say you love me ..
And you mean it,
I gasp..
Cause it makes things
So much harder for the times
When you don't.


Powered by ScribeFire.



I scribble past
The words
Just to realise
There is this endless space
waiting for your pen
To write on
You are the one
Who is
Running ahead of it..
May be
Falling behind ??


Powered by ScribeFire.


Memories Remain...

>> Mar 13, 2008

How well can you
Conceal the fact
that The poet
& Left.
And still the best poetry
Took birth
When he wasn't here
Amongst us,
But Inside.
With the ink
Called remembrance.
(...the mortal speaks...)
And I had considered
Presence is such a bliss
Never knew
Absence as the vaporising agony.


[This is a special tribute to all those poets of Ah,poetry who have left for some reasons.That include Latha mam,Sunita mam,Gopal,Manan,Sashu et al ]

Please pardon my memory if I have missed someone very dear.AP will always miss you no matter what Soumya scribbles in incoherence & will be hopeful if ,someday,they just come back..

Powered by ScribeFire.


Ephemeral Epitaph

We write
& rewrite
A renewed verse.
Some lines scribbled
Some scratched..,
An undiluted form of art,--
Innocently revealing.

Then we hide ,
From here and
From there.
Words invoked,
Expressions discharged.
And we guard ourselves
beneath the poetry.
Parchments pile up
One ,

We hide beneath
the hidden meanings.
And one day
it suffocates...
Is there any place to resurface?
We gasp under the falsehood.

And a paper buries us yet again
Speaking the truth for Us.
What we couldn't
But did our Ephemeral Epitaph.


[P.S.--This seemingly unrealistic thought process has a special note of thanks to give to Rukhiya for her warm and sensuous touch on this subject and for enlightening me with them]

Powered by ScribeFire.



>> Mar 11, 2008

Do not tell me yet
The words I want to hear.
Let the magic remain.
Let it linger between
The expected & the obvious.
And when I go wild,
Love me.
Your eyes for my assurance.
Your silence for my certainty.
If I ever ask
"How do you keep things vague"
Give me a kiss.
The buoyant feeling
Would replete itself
With the ethereal nectar.
And a bubble bursts!


Powered by ScribeFire.


Being Perforated...

Drenched in rain
I saw words oozing out
Of my breath,
My blood
And i felt empty.
As the last word went out
In discomforting disdain ,
I realized
A poet's soul salvages
Just when he can live
Without words
for Silence.

My perforated soul
embraced the much awaited


Powered by ScribeFire.


On a more mundane note..

>> Mar 10, 2008

...And you sit motionless
Your grip tightens on my hand
Your face expressionless,
Still voices grief,

I look down
With my inabilities
to hold on to you.

And wait for a moment
When you would


The moment never comes.
(Silence.....) prevails
And I walk away,
Awaiting endless moments
And answering uncountable silent questions.
Which you could have asked out L.O.U.D.
Which you could have reacted on
Retaliated on.

You kept (....numb)

I wondered.
If only you could have been
A bit more humane
And a bit more

I would have loved the pain
Than being denied from it.


Powered by ScribeFire.


Off Spring..

>> Mar 7, 2008


A baby is born
What is so unnatural?
Millions do.
But look, the baby
holds onto his mother
And those twenty six flowers
Brought for him
from nowhere.


He never had trouble
With words
Unlike making friends
Unlike in the field.
Unlike losing virginity
And he found his strength
In expressing himself.
So he chuckled.


HE didnt know
Whom he had to love
But he loved her.
That brown eyed girl.
And he realized his poems fast
and with sense and feel.
he realised this is love.
So his silent gestures &
lovable metaphors
agreed on sweet consequences.
And they walked in rain
and made love
Then there was that
Blue eyed girl.
Along came poems.
He got confused.
But felt enriched.
It was his 'poetic liberty'.
He reassured.


The poet matured.
So he thought
And he became popular.
He went certain
As he could bring in fresh leaves
From autumn trees.
As he couldn't 'teach' poetry
And as he got applauded
Every time he recited.
He enslaved words
Instead of entrusting them
And they danced to his tune.


One day
The words eloped
They just betrayed the
Schizophrenic mind
And stood aloof.
He is worthless--shouted some.
I am wordless--the poet retaliated.
But no one could read the poetry
In his face.
The poet crumbled.


And the poet died
A pretty normal death.
No one knew because
No one cared.
A poet without words
was indeed very average.
But a young bard came up
And wrote on his epitaph,
"Dear sir,
You remain.
In us
Through them (words)

And the spring prevailed.
Call it a poetry
for it is a poet's story.


[This seemingly meaningless and endless
scribbling is inspired from 'Life is Elsewhere' by Milan
Kundera..Thanks for taking the pain and going through it.]

Powered by ScribeFire.


Dream on...

An absolute pause
Awaits the moment.
Where I can laugh
I can cry,
I can surrender and
Reign over me.

: Life is strange.
We know the obvious
Still we ask for assurance.
Is it?

I stand quiet.
Almost breathless
Expecting your whisper
That will fill the heart.
My eyes are closed.
Vision is such a certainty
I don't need it right now.

MORALE : But it never came.
Look through the rain
Why don't you accept reality?
Does it hurt too much?
Still love ponders on

I get soaked in rain
I drench in realization
Beyond that mist of sustenance
There is no one standing.
And I see my emotions
Yet again.
As I await
The next rain.

: Love remains.
If not between you and me
If not as a visible bond
But in the pure daylight,
In the emotional rain,
In the vibrant nature
And in You.


The morale dies.
But the girl remains.
Reassuring herself
If ever
For a moment
Wonder strikes
And he utters
...............Love only.

Dream on.


Powered by ScribeFire.


Mutual Death

I gasp...
A bit of a breather..,
And I look out of the window.
Is it a dark moon night??
I wait for sanity
But only grimace sustains..
A sense of cruelty hovers around
Devaluing my conscience.
No pity,
No mercy.
I get down.
I don't want to be the hunted.
So I slit my wrist.
In the lost city of humanity
I sit victorious
Waiting to ooze the venom
Out of me.
And I die.
So as to live in purity.
Impunity I claim.


Powered by ScribeFire.


Wings of love..

>> Feb 20, 2008

She flew;
With unbound joy
And her Pegasus hopes
Escaped through
the mundane bond,
As they gave me the
Wings of love
To follow her
Love beckons,
For us.


Powered by ScribeFire.


Enchanted ...

I stand
Under the starry sky
Where the dark welcomes
His certainty
and the stars reassure.

A restless mind
Pleads for his presence...--
Befalling silence,
Baffling hopes,
and icicle of wishes--

As I wait too
For Him to embrace us,
To protect us from plight
From pain
From sufferings.

Suddenly an awakening halo !
A new dawn..
And I stand amazed.
As I see Him in me.
In you
And in all !

I feel reassured
and contented.

And I walk
Towards the light,
For salvation.

[To high hopes and good wishes...


Powered by ScribeFire.



>> Feb 18, 2008

On that fragment
Of my life,
I stood
Shaking off
All the obstination
And perplexity.

Being sure
of myself
Was the most
Daunting task,
That I had to
Assume first
and relate later.

I left all my
Mundane whatabouts
And the vices
I was made of...
Aware of.

I stood
at the horizon
Expecting You
Above me.

Then only
The rainbow

I stretched my hands
Only to be touched by You,
I shivered.

In Fulfillment.


Powered by ScribeFire.


In Ode to Our Love

>> Feb 15, 2008

I didn't realize
Until her soft touch,
Her shivering palm
nudged mine.
And that was it.
Long lost,
almost forbidden emotions
lumped near my throat
And tried to escape ....

Sudden joy,
Heartfelt Exclamation!
And a loving tear.

"Sssh! darling
let us not cry tonight"-She said.
I obeyed;
As did my emotions.
And i stared at her eyes
As if only purity exists--
In her,
For me.

We let our eyes speak
With silent gestures,
Mischievous ,

"Happy Valentine's day" never came up.
We always knew it won't.
Our wishes were born
in Each other's hearts.
And never died.



To Illusion...Respite!

Some wet words
Some foggy dreams--


A moment of reckoning.
Pondering thoughts.
Dimmed in philosophy,
Escapist realism.


Life thrives for love.
That sensation,
That magic,
Tragic role reversals.

It remains.

To live
And to love
Juxtaposed they seem.
But isnt life so?


Maybe No.

Let me love.
Being oblivious of all.





Death Echoes...

>> Jan 25, 2008

Blessed she felt
And happiness echoed from
Her silent gestures
As she learned that
Her womb now had
the 'seed of life'.

The transformation -
From a woman to a mother;
It thrilled her,
Engulfed her into ethereal dreams
Tender moments
And happy-only memories.

The silkworm of hope
Wove coloured fabrics
Until it got rustled under negligence.

Little did she knew
That her collateral string
With her own baby
Would prove to be its death cord.

As she gleamed with hope,
And a shining future,
The umbilical cord
And tightened its grip on
The life's tiniest spark
To its futile culmination.

A cold bleak death
Invited the poor soul.
As the unaware mother
Had herself to blame only
And chose her child's way.

The cord hung itself cynically
Being the unwanted witness to
Two unfortunate deaths.


[Umbilicial Strangulation is a very rare accident in which the umbilical cord(the cord connecting the yet-to-be-born baby with mother)fastenes across the child's neck to give it a suffocating death and if not it can also harm the child a great deal]

The other interpretation is derivable from itself.I take this story as an opportunity to go
beyond two human lives and see it as a psychic phenomenon where we are caught unaware of our over-ambitiousness ,perversions as they actually grow inside us,with our negligence,and ultimately strangles us to a point of no return.]

[Any type of medical and technical error is highly regretted.I am not related to this
profession.Just had some references.Thank you.]

Powered by ScribeFire.


Dyslexic Silence

>> Jan 6, 2008

We had held our hands
As waves rushed in
to wet our feet.
A vision blurred,
A hand secured,
A moment of trust--
All contemplated into the absolute,

We stood apart
As waves rushed in only to
mark us our dissection.
A vision blurred,
A hand tightening,
A moment of agony-
All circling into the nothingness,


I guess we all are accustomed to the term Dyslexia now.

Powered by ScribeFire.


The Hungry Tide

Inspirations Continue...

  © Blogger templates Romantico by 2008

Back to TOP